9/25/13

Be Generous or Thirsty

Anyone that wishes to be released from the clutches of fear, addiction, anxiety, lust, anger or obsession would do well to listen closely.  Generosity must be your foundation.  We must live as if life depends on skillful acts of kindness.  Our happiness depends on it.  Begin with generosity towards others, and then take joy in those acts.

The main problem we face is our own stinginess.  We swim in a cesspool of greed.  Then we wonder why we can’t see, or how we got to smell so foul.  Perhaps we don’t like ourselves, or worse, we’ve convinced ourselves that our stinginess is agreeable, or we simply think there is no other way.  OH!  But there is always another way.

I see this in myself.  Subtle forms of stinginess hide within me and it's even encouraged by our greedy culture.  My mind uses its own intelligence as a tool to do itself harm.  How often do we stop, pause and reflect to see just what it is we are holding?

I also see this in spiritual communities.  So many opportunities to be generous and kind go unnoticed, if not avoided all together.  I can always measure how much I’m suffering by how little I donate in terms of resources, time, or service.  How ironic, that this happens even among those spiritually thirsty “you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make her drink.”

9/16/13

Community

All my life, the one thing that was always present during moments of happiness was a sense of healthy community.  It is so odd that in our current era of advanced technology and social networks, it is mostly absent.  I believe this is a phenomenon that is deeply embedded in the psychological structure of society.  There is nothing healthy about greed and that’s what most of human interaction encourages these days.

While I was training in the gym today, I had to wait on the squat rack.  Initially as I was waiting, a sense of entitlement arose in me.  It was based on the conceit that most in the gym don’t do what I do.  I manage to notice the shift in my mind, when it began to color everyone in the gym grey with hostility.  I began to tighten up, and feel threatened.  But, I paused, took a deep refreshing breath, and then I asked myself “what if I just feel glad that everyone here has made some type of commitment to be here in the first place?”  I let the question drop.

The shift encouraged me to ask some guys that were training “would you guys mind if I squat with you all?”  The guys seemed elated; they smiled, and said “sure, jump right in!”    As we trained we exchanged ideas about training ethic, shoes, and even spotted each other.  I put my ego aside, and fed on their interest, and commitment to leg training.  Then it occurred to me that we were in fact a community of fitness enthusiasts that trained in the same gym.  Why can’t every human experience lead to new and renewed bonds such as this?

There is always something positive to feed on within another human being.  It doesn’t matter how little you like them, or know of them.  Seeing the goodness in others doesn’t require you to ignore any wrong they’ve done, or to love them.  It just means that you’ve made a conscious decision to train in the habit of resting your mind on others good qualities first, and that is an invaluable habit.  Especially, to those that tend to be very-very hard on themselves!

9/13/13

Balance


It is very interesting how the mind works.  I usually do NOT post when I fail to observe the 8 precepts on Uposatha days.  I think it’s due to embarrassment, and a sense of not wanting to celebrate by sharing my thoughts of the day or week.  Needless to say, I failed to observe all the 8 precepts.

Yet, thanks to Ajahn Sarayut Arnanta, I began to realize that I was not seeing the whole picture.  My mind has a tendency to dwell on the things that I have not accomplished, ignoring all of the things that I have accomplished.  Although, I had failed to observe on one day, my Practice is something I am doing to change how I live and find happiness.  This practice is nothing short of life changing, when we hold it right.

Instead of beating myself up over the one Precept I have trouble following for one day.  I should review how much of my life has changed and improved overall.  Where is it that my life has settled easefully into the gifts of the practice?  Recognizing my accomplishments will only serve to sustain my inner wealth and happiness.  This is after all, not a practice of extremes, but of moderation; The Middle Way.


My fitness and strength goals have naturally settled me into following 7 of the 8 precepts during the work week, Monday through Friday.  I find that following the 7 keeps me strong and has improved my strength dramatically.  However, my appetite has also increased due to new and heavier workloads.  This makes it very challenging to hold the food precept with kindness.  Yet, if the overall goal is to change how I live my life, I am still doing that, which takes more than just one day to do.

9/4/13

Mental Training


I grew up having a negative body image for various reasons.  I was also kept secluded, away from most other children.  This made it so that playing sports was simply not an option for me.  I did not have the social skills or the physical ability to compete with my peers.

I gravitated to strength training, because it was something that I could do alone, something that would give me confidence, a positive body image.  Over the years it became a spiritual experience.  The act of confronting a physical challenge always requires that you have your mind in order and focused.  This led me to have an immense respect for discipline.  How else could I keep lifting heavy weight?  Training the body became my way of life.

I’ve attained many things from my enthusiasm for fitness.  Not all of them good.  I am, unfortunately prone to being intoxicated with stories about myself.  “I can do what others can’t.  I have something that others don’t.”  Or the reversal of which is even more common for me.  “I can’t do what other can.  I don’t have something that others do have.” Either of which is conceit.  No to mention how much it depresses me to recognize that one day, In the not so distant future, I will not be able to sustain my fitness efforts or my body in its current condition.


How can I produce a life of profound value?  What challenge can I commit to that will satisfy my deepest yearnings?  What is there left for me to do?  The only thing left is to train the mind!